Blog Archives

Robyn Stein DeLuca: The good news about PMS

http://wp.me/p4y3dj-1UZ

Scientific proof that PMS is a myth ….

Long day-visit to the in-laws

http://wp.me/p4y3dj-1TP

The Problem with “Don’t Feed the Trolls”

About the Speaker:
Steph Guthrie is a feminist advocate and community manager whose work tackles the intersections of gender, culture and technology. Steph founded Women in Toronto Politics and is a faculty member and lifelong learner at Academy of the Impossible. Her comments have appeared in the Globe & Mail, the Toronto Star, the National Post, Metro News, CBC, Global News and FLARE Magazine. Steph holds a Master of Arts in Communication & Culture from York and Ryerson Universities. Follow her on Twitter at @amirightfolks.

Female, Educated, and Perpetually Single

“Have you met someone?” “Are you dating someone?” “Don’t worry; you’ll find someone.” These are among the most common and despised expressions levied against young, unmarried women in today’s society. Despite personal and academic success, women in American culture continue to be considered incomplete without a ring on their finger. As a 31-year-old female, educated, independent, and accomplished, but not married, not engaged and not even close, Erica knows what it is to be seen as a failure according to traditional gender norms. She seeks to raise awareness about the continuing pressures of marriage for young (and slightly less young) women in the United States. She promises not to deride marriage, but rather, to share her thoughts and experiences as a single, 30-something, female dating in the 21st century. Her talk is sure to resonate with audience members of all genders and ages, filled with humor, realism, and hope in which the suggestion is that parents, relatives, peers and friends just let fate run its course. Basically, she’s not worried; so please stop worrying for her!

The slut, the spinster and the perfect woman: Martha Mosse

In this talk, Martha Mosse an award-winning performance and visual artist brought up in England and France, talks about her work and the labels of Slut, Spinster and Perfect.
Her movement-based works are skilful and thought-provoking investigations of liberty and constraint.Her installations involve performance behind and within spandex structures, designed to allow but also limit movement. Her malleable ‘prisons’ are both restrictive and the medium for the performer’s expression.
Mosse says: ‘Spandex is a uniquely flexible material. The anonymous women I place behind this skin-like screen become bodies without identity, human-like but not entirely human. The performers — including myself — are objectified by the gaze of the gallery audience.’
Mosse is currently a resident artist at DEBUT Contemporary gallery in Notting Hill and performs at their monthly private view. In 2012 Mosse co-created the online forum Day As A Woman. The project collects examples of sexism from the public and then uses them to curate new art installations. You can find examples of her work at http://www.marthamosse.tumblr.com

The Weird Way Women Downplay Their Success

Uptalk is defined as finishing sentences with a rising intonation, often indicating a question or uncertainty. Research shows that though both men and women do it, women are more guilty of it even when they’re correct or asserting themselves! Anthony and Laci ‘uptalk’ about the gender divide in the way we speak and it’s implications.

I got my permanent residency in Canada! And other Haitian tales…

I can’t believe it! I was  expecting it around may, and it came! Now, I don’t know what to do! Too many opportunities! I can go back to school in Canada and work wherever I want, or I can stay in Haiti and do whatever I want.  I a little overwhelmed because I planned around not having my residency for the next few months, but its better to have too many choices than nothing at all.

I don’t think there will be any adventures today. Yesterday after posting I had to run to my other aunt’s house because she was sick and her son was freaking out, when I got by home , I talked with my cousin then I received the email from immigration. I was too exited to sleep naturally so I took 25 mg of Seroquel and slept.

__________

I didn’t have time to finish the post this morning. The day when pretty well, my mood went down during the afternoon though, I felt like all my energy was gone. When I got home my dad started lecturing me about how I stress too much, and the depression is all in my head and that they should make me toughen up. I told him if he keeps annoying me I would just move out. He stopped talking. I was very upset because I’m doing pretty well and he has no clue of what happened in my life. He’s partly responsible of me being so messed up since he wasn’t around enough.

Something else happened today that was weird, I guess it’s a cultural shock. Let me know what you think. I went to lunch with my boyfriend and while we were leaving I was holding  a cold water bottle in my hands.  Bf and I were talking and I coughed a little. A man stopped my boyfriend and told him that I should not be drinking cold water if I’m coughing. I’m gonna shut my eyes on the fact that it was none of his business since I’ve explained to you that people think they’re responsible for you well being. My problem is why he didn’t address me directly. I’m not my boyfriend’s daughter, I felt like since I was a woman he had to talk to my man instead of my like I was an object. I don’t think he thinks of me as an object but I think the culture is so chauvinistic that they don’t realize that it’s inappropriate. What shocked me the most is that when I got home, I told my aunts and my dad and they didn’t find anything wrong with it. Am I over thinking it? Am I being too much of a feminist? Please let me know what you think.

Bf is going back to Canada next week snif… I’m really gonna miss him, we had a great time together. We won’t see each other at least before May. It’s gonna be hard because I’m feeling in love these days. Sexually wise I’m gonna be just fine … I think most of us have very low libido while on anti depressant. I know you guys are from different fields so can somebody tell me if it’s a good idea to stop my periods for the next couple of months? Since I won’t be having sex I don’t see why I should remove the Nuvaring every 3 weeks to have a fake period. The only reason I do it, is because I’m paranoid about getting pregnant and not knowing it. But no sex.. No pregnancy risk. So that’s another question for you to answer, please…..

Good news! I’m going to the beach this weekend! (If we find gas lol).  I think the gas shortage should be over by the end of the week. We’re probably gonna be sleeping over there. We haven’t had a lot of alone time since we came here, and last time we went to the beach I was sick (just my luck! ) Lol. What else? Meditating to sleep is working, I love it! That zen thing is good :). I hope I get well soon so I can start exercising. I brought my Wii, and my cousins have workout DVDs. I can’t go to the gym yet or start playing tennis with my trainer until I know where exactly I’m gonna live. I have job opportunities in two different provinces (5h drive between them) my dad is in Port au Prince and my mom is in Cap Haitien. I’d rather stay with my mom honestly, so we’ll see if they hire me.

That’s all for tonight my loves! I’m slowly coming back to blogging! Take care, be mindful and love yourself!

Kisses!

 

 

We should all be feminists: Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie

This one is long but it’s totally worth it…I’m listening to a new Beyonce song and she took part of her speech from it! I felt like she stole my secret! I always forget that I’m not the only one who watched TED talks! The speaker is a Nobel Price winner. Anyways let me know what you think about it! I really hope you watch it….

Women and empathy — trouble on the home front: Sheila Norgate

Sheila Norgate is a visual artist, performer, feminist, author, lesbian, and lover of dogs, not necessarily in that order (especially according to her dog). Her paintings have been exhibited in galleries throughout North America and her work is widely collected.

This talk explores the issue of empathy from a distinctly feminist perspective. Norgate looks at how women are systematically conditioned to leave themselves, their bodies, their experience, and go to the ‘other’ almost always at their own expense. She draws on her personal history, her sense of humour, as well as excerpts from her collection of vintage books on etiquette, charm and beauty. She closes the talk with the point that true empathy must be an ‘inside job’.

Miss Representation

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Thank you mommy for raising me how you you did ! I’m watching Miss Representation right now and I can’t help myself but to thank my mom to raise me like a boy ( if I can put it like that ) .Until started working I never realized that because I was a woman I might miss some opportunities. Because I had no brothers I never felt like I needed to be protected by a guy. I guess I was very naive or did not realize that my peers didn’t have the same chances I had. Being able to be go out by myself, stand up for what I believe etc.. Was I raised as a feminist? Probably, but I’m glad I was. I don’t hate man, I want to get married I even want to wear the white dress but does it mean I want to be a housewife? ABSOLUTELY NOT! A friend once told me that I should stop challenging my boyfriend, to let him be the man…. WHAT DOES THAT MEAN? Women have come to believe that by playing dumb they are acting smart…SPEECHLESS!

Now that I’m thinking about it when I was in college I got into a little bit of trouble for forgetting my ”place” as a woman. I was VP of the student council and for some reason the president thought I was his secretary. When it came to planning parties and correcting his speech I had all the freedom. But I could not take any executive decision. I did not take it as sexism because I’ve never seen myself as different from men but maybe it was.

I remember when I told my boyfriend I was going to get a second bachelor degree then get my PhD in psychology his primary concern was how I was going to take care of the kids when I have them. Until I made him realize that he did not plan of sacrificing his career for our future kids. Even though he’s young and modern he still view female’s role as being a housewife. The modern version of wife is that mother with two kids, a full time job and does most of the parenting. Our generation are still seeing fathers as playmate for the kids.I cannot really grasp the dichotomy of man being strong leaders and woman having to nurture them.

The documentary talks about how media projects women, how they judge the most powerful women in the world by their look.It makes me remember the last election in Quebec where Pauline Marois (a woman) was running against Jean Charest (a man).  I remember hearing people calling her ”la grosse vache ” , meaning ” the big cow”. Her male opponents have also been called name but none of them where related to how they look. Don’t get me wrong, I have absolutely no political affiliation with the current prime Minister (she won) neither do I agree with her vision of Quebec but I respect her for having the courage to stand for what she believes.

The situation of women in Quebec and Canada is far better than other sides of the world but there is still work to do. Most of the time it’s us women that are our own worse enemies. We don’t believe that we can be more than the role society has assigned us. It’s our duty to see ourselves as equal as man, different but equals. We cannot expect to be taken seriously if we don’t take each other seriously. And PLEASE stop sparing men’s feeling and don’t be scare to challenge their masculinity because there is no such things.

So joint the movement, take the pledge today!

“I pledge to use my voice to challenge society’s limiting representations of gender.” – See more at: http://therepresentationproject.org/pledge#sthash.JFxQmptl.dpuf