Wisdom, friendship and learning
Hey my loves!
I’m going to Canada next week! Which means…. I’m gonna be with JACK!!!! 🙂 And I’m going back to Haiti with him! So exited!
If you’ve read my last post you’re gonna realize that I’ve been having a philosophical conversation with my friend since yesterday. I feel grateful I got close to him. It’s not really easy to befriend a guy without having him hit on you. But since he’s very rational, he sees that we have a mutually beneficial relationship. If you remember, in the past year I’ve been modifying my circle of friends. I’ve removed the negative ones, took some distance with the ones that weren’t bringing anything positive into my life, I have a new category of friends (My hang out friends), and I got close with a few new ones that complete me. We enjoy spending time with each other , we have meaningful conversations and we are there for one another. I prioritize quality over quantity now.
In my quest of being authentic is slowly evolving. I’m happy to be myself and I’m not scared of being criticize. I still get hurt, and I’m still vulnerable to bullying and hurtful words but now it’s easier for me to get over it. I know I talk about it a lot, but compassion is the best weapon against wickedness. Now I’m proud to have the gift of empathy. I do a lot of research about human nature, take insight from people who are more experience and seek answers to mysteries. I stay open to the unknown and accept that impossible doesn’t exist,so I should take into consideration every point of view.
Self improvement is personal. There is no guideline on happiness. You have to find what works for you. I don’t plan on reinventing the wheel so I collecting information from others who had done extensive research on different topics and I adapt them to my situation.
“Yesterday I was clever, so I wanted to change the world. Today I am wise, so I am changing myself.”
This quote applies to me… although I’m not wise yet because is still want to change the world, but I try to focus more on myself. How to adapt, how to react, how to choose my battles. I know now that I’m worthy of love and belonging. Sometimes it’s a a waste of time to try to fit in a group, you simply don’t fit in because the group is not made for you. I believe that eventually you will find your fit. I think I’ve found my community in blogging. I’m not a part of any other group in the real world , but I’ve created around me a support system with strong bonds, they are not interconnected but that’s fine. I love them they love me and we share mutual trust.
“Over the years, I have come to realize that the greatest trap in our life is not success, popularity, or power, but self-rejection. Success, popularity, and power can indeed present a great temptation, but their seductive quality often comes from the way they are part of the much larger temptation to self-rejection. When we have come to believe in the voices that call us worthless and unlovable, then success, popularity, and power are easily perceived as attractive solutions. The real trap, however, is self-rejection. As soon as someone accuses me or criticizes me, as soon as I am rejected, left alone, or abandoned, I find myself thinking, “Well, that proves once again that I am a nobody.” … [My dark side says,] I am no good… I deserve to be pushed aside, forgotten, rejected, and abandoned. Self-rejection is the greatest enemy of the spiritual life because it contradicts the sacred voice that calls us the “Beloved.” Being the Beloved constitutes the core truth of our existence.”
― Henri J.M. Nouwen